Jason : all the pictures from that weekend are here: www.flickr.com/photos/jasonhiggins21
Jason: there are some funny ones
Chuck: we are all retarded.
Jason: yes...which makes none of retarded based on the theory of multiple retardation
Ah...so simple...so true
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Funny Faces from this weekend...
Check out the rest of the pictures @ www.flickr.com/photos/jasonhiggins21Here is the short short version of the weekend...we got drunk, i woke up, i went into the water, i got drunk again, i went home. Plus I ate massive amounts of food, mainly surviving on pizza and scraps of chicken rolls. I can't really think of any quality stories at the moment, but if one comes to me I will be sure to post it later today. Hill...you got any?
PS...Don't watch Jaws 4 days before you go swimming in the ocean...
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Semi-Finalist
Where to begin...
I was a semi-finalist in a drag queen contest last night. There...I said it.
We celebrated a co-workers 30th birthday at Lucky Chengs last night (http://www.planetluckychengs.com/). The short short version: its a chinese restaurant that has an entire staff made up of transvestites (some pre-op, some post-op). So half way through dinner they start putting on their show.
"Hazel Nut" began his/her show by singing songs, going around the room talking to people...dancing...straddling someones mother...etc. On a side note, before I got there I thought how funny it would be to bring my family there without telling them what it was. But after seeing someones mom straddled by a tranny I was pretty sure I would never do that to my sweet, wholesome parents. So after some songs, and some very uncomfortable moments we were able to go back to eating without fear of a 6'2" drag queen rubbing up on us.
ADD moment: There was a chick there that must have had triple F tits. They asked her what she did and she said she’s a porn rockstar. She sings in a band called Erocktica….look it up, no joke. Joe, I think you should convert your band to a porn rock band. About 10 minutes later
"Hazel Nut" comes back on the mic and tells about the envelopes they were in the process of handing out. We put money in the envelope and then write someones name on it. If they like what's in the envelope then they'll call your friend to come participate in the "special show". Well our birthday girl got angry and didn't go up...but it didn't matter because they have a some bullshit rule that if you're sitting at a mixed table (girls and guys) then the girl on stage can pick a guy from her table to go up. Guess who got picked... If you were far away or have bad vision you would recognize me as the one that was slamming beers trying to get drunk enough so I wasn’t completely uncomfortable. In the 5 min it took for “Hazel Nut” to explain how the Drag Show was going to work, I slammed two Amstels and shot of Patron. I got a wig and some chick shirt, then went back to my table for my makeup job. I looked ridiculous.
ADD moment: just remembered one of the guys on stage was a choreographer for Eminem and other rappers. Thought that might give Lowden a stiffy.
So we all went back up on stage, and danced around to Madonna or some crap like that. For some reason our waitress, “Heather”, thought I deserved to be in the semi-finals. I told her I really really really didn’t want to be up there anymore. However once I discovered that liquor was the prize, I quickly changed my mind. So me, some guy having a bachelor party and some foreign dude that was having waaaaay too much fun playing drag queen. The restaurant voted who should win best drag queen, and I’m happy to say I lost.
And that my friends is how I ended up as a semi-finalist in a Drag Show.
Wasted at work...
I got out of bed at nine and just sat in the shower for a good twenty minutes. For some reason I thought that would sober me up....no...didn't help much at all. Hangover should commence within the hour
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Hill's Birthday
It's Hill's birthday this weekend down at the Jersey Shore...things are bound to get a little out of control.
<-------- Hmmm...wonder why?
I'm torn between bringing down the usual arsenol of Patron or Cabo Wabo....or his favorite, Jameson. Now obviously its his birthday so you think it would be easy...but Jameson causes trouble waaaaaay beyond that of tequila (at least for the Jersey folks.
On a side note, I'm listening to Kayne West's "The New Workout Plan"...its hilarious.
Continuing on...regardless of the hard alcohol there will definitely be a beer ball or two. What's that? You thought Budweiser stopped making those in the 80's? Oh no...they're alive and well and Hall has a Beer Ball Tap and it's glorious! JERSEY RULES!!
More on this as the week progresses...and obviously there will be updates after the weekend.
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